The worst is when you have a stuffy nose, and you forget your Kleenex box at home, and you're forced to blow your nose on the rough bathroom paper towel, which is that horrible brown recycled craft stuff, so you're more or less blowing la nez avec une 8 1/2 x 11 sheet of paper. The result is a giant red honker.
I look like Bozo the clown. Or more so, I should say...
Meet Dr. Albert McMeowsers! Bert, to friends and family. He's a professional Snuggler and Motor Boat Sound Effect Technician ("purr purr purr"). His days are spent napping, and busying himself with interior design--relocating toilet paper rolls to different areas of the house, and recovering furniture with black fur. He likes having his (giant) paws squeezed, grooming himself and his besties, and has recently discovered the endless fun of a glass topped table.
When not sleeping in the windowsill, you can find him under the Library Lady's feet or getting cozy in small,box-type spaces.
Easy there, ladies. I know he's a looker, but he's very much taken.
'Tis K-day, folks. Time for the kitty Albert McMeowsers to git 'er on home.
...
Here's hoping he still thinks I'll make a cool homey.
*fingers crossed*
I found the kitty of my dreams yesterday. He's a wee, 2-year-old peanut wearing a tuxedo. I'm going to chill with him at lunch, but alas with there being no holds allowed on at this time of year (too many disappointments and no-shows), I'm hoping he'll still be there when I go to pick him Friday night...
Check HIM out (you'll have to scroll down to T for Tuxedo)
Any name suggestions? What with him wearing a tuxedo, I'm thinking it needs to be quite formal, non?
p.s. He's clearly smiling in that picture, huh? Probs knows I'm lookin' at 'em...
I'd like to thank everyone for helping fight the man! Please give yourself a big pat on the 'ole back. We had an idea, we worked towards it, and we saw it through to the end. 'Tis the essence of success, non?
Click HERE for the full story.
And thank you to Fingers for pointing out our glorious triumph.
*ahem*
*blows into microphone*
Testing... Testing... Is this thing on?
*taps microphone*
Hi there. My name's Connor. I'm a Scorpio, and every bit as intense and loyal as the tarot cards say we are. I enjoy being wrapped like a burrito, making jazz hands, and breast milk. I still have an umbilical cord nubbin, and I wear an extra tiny diaper. I travel well, like the feeling of a snug onsie, and make a variety of facial expressions.
I'm looking for someone who wants to hold hands, kiss my cheeks, snuggle close, and who will remember to turn off the flash before we take pictures. If you're interested and want to get your cuddle on, please call 1-800-FARKINGCUTE.
This wee peanut is available. Right now.
He's tempting.
He's very tempting...
*bites lip*
*shifty eyes*
I do have a thing for ridiculous looking cats, don't I?
And his name is Hayworth. I mean... Hayworth? Really? 'Tis meant to be, perhaps... Is his mouth open slightly?
Reminds me a bit of the Gherkin (pictured right), non?
1. One of the questions on today's final "quiz/test" was:
If you come across someone who's received a laceration to the abdominal, and their intestines are protruding from their body cavity, what should you do:
a) Cover the intestines in a warm, damp, sterile cloth.
b) Gather the intestines, and push them back inside.
c) Pull the intestines further outside the body, and wipe them off.
2. My instructor is constantly referring to the laws of Ontario and Q-bec. Who says that? Q-bec... So. Annoying.
3. Transformers is a really good movie. This point is unrelated, but I'm watching it as I type this, and I thought it an important point to highlight.
4. There's a Ti-Cat in my class, and he's much too big for our wee university-lecture-hall-style seats. The three protein bars and giant protein shake he ate today aren't helping matters.
5. Instructor lady is a bit of a Penelope. For every condition we discuss, she's had a family member who's suffered from it: angina, congenital heart failure, amputation, chemical burn, and choking to death. She also regaled us with the story of her son's birth. She's 58, don't you know, and she had him late in life (43), which makes her the oldest mom at his baseball games, but she quit smoking when she was pregnant with him and hasn't looked back since, because she wants to be around for him, you know? And last week she joined Curves. She put 40 pounds on when her sister died last year of blood clots, and she just woke up on Monday and said, "I don't fit in my pants anymore." So she she went to Dominion, and Curves was right next door, and when she went inside she bought a membership, and yesterday was her first training session and usually she comes home and her son says "I need help with my homework" but last night she was too exhausted from her circuit training to even think about making dinner.
So don't feel sorry for her.
6. I get to wear pants without a waistband on a weekday.
Yes folks, that's right. Beneath this seemingly sweet exterior is a seedy side. In fact, I'm currently involved in criminal activity, the punishment for which is a sentence of up to 10 years’ imprisonment.
Name that crime!
False alarm people. False alarm. Not sure how that happens, but baby, mother (and amniotic fluid) are all still very much attached.
(Little Wee Owl)
(African Elephant)
(River Hippopotamus)
(Lowland Gorilla)
(Great Indian Rhinoceros)
(Live Reef Corals)
(Moon Jellyfish)
So c'mon baby beef, let's ger 'er done. Auntie needs a new pair of shoes (and a baby to get her snuggle on with.)
The way I see it, you've been in there for 9 months. And if I was a turkey thermometer, I'd say you're ready. So unstrap yourself from your uterine hammock, put the chip bag down, turn the TV off, and get out of that womb.
Last night was the Feist concert with Fingers. I had totally forgotten I'd given her the tickets for her birthday some months back, so 'twas a lovely surprise come last Friday to be reminded!
Feist makes me think of the hip kids in Library School--Sleeves and Hurr_ah--who knew and loved her back when she did shows in scuzzy U of A on-campus pubs. I admit I am a late Feist enthusiast, but have grown to really like her. And last night's concert only amplified that x100,000!
The highlight (besides her lovely velvet voice) was the crew of artists she had working behind her on stage. They used an overhead projector and everyday items (material, finger paint, beads, leaves, etc.) to create these scenes, which they then projected onto the giant screen behind the stage. It was totally hypnotizing! And so ridiculously beautiful and unique.
I have no idea who's concept it was--Feist's or the young people carrying out the art project--but it totally made the evening and the concert, even from the nosebleed section!
p.s. I was totally kidding Lil' F... I'm not mad at you, and we're not fighting. And you were right about the "awesomeness"...
Heather was a (third place costume winning) bottle of mustard, BSB was a keg, Free Samples was a tree, and I was a garden! Tra la! And those are real flowers people...
